One of the most interesting things about getting sick for me is Nyquil and the way it makes me dream the strangest dreams. Last night I dreamed that I was in my parents house from when I was little. I was a kid but I wasn't me. I had looked in a mirror and I was someone else. My parents were Not my parents and since I physically needed to pee I was looking for a bathroom in my dream. The only one they had was on the back porch. I remember thinking "wow they will never sell a house with a toilet on the porch."
My other dreams have been on being a human who could shape shift into a dolphin trying to make a go of it on land.

These are all strange for me lately cause my latest dreams have been all me getting mugged(my check was wrong that day) and alien parasites trying to reproduce in my body. (from which I woke up screaming when Christopher touched me in the night)

I marvel at how well the boys did yesterday gathering all the things we would need to go camping at between the worlds. They got it all done in one day. I am not that focused. I am procrastinating on making my handouts for the two classes I am teaching there. My mind has been somewhere else though. My dad went into the hospital Wednesday. He has a couple of things the doctors are working on healing. His heart was beating to fast, a blood clot In his lung, and swelling in his legs. I think my nephew put it best on how I feel.
My six year old nephew Sam called my dad saying he really wanted to see him, He didn't want him to go away and not come back. Sam said he would miss him. I can say I feel the same way. After visiting him though I feel okay going to between the worlds. That feeling I get when someone is getting ready to pass over wasn't there. My dad was firmly rooted in life. He was feeling like a pincushion and not feeling well but I think He will recover. He also said he would be here for a while for sam and I know my dad wouldn't let him down.
It is times like these that our faith is either destroyed or reinforced. I am choosing the latter. As part of my daily devotions I started chanting Pagan taylored Pow Wow chants for healing for my dad every day. It is strange that I started doing this way before he decided to go to the hospital. I think it just goes to show that magic follows the least resistance to get to the goal. My dad got sicker and went to the hospital where he could get the care he needs to get better and they had a new way of dealing with his issues. I will keep up the healing magic and prayer for him. I also ask any one who reads this to lend there prayers, light and magic to help my dad get back on his feet.
Now I should get back to packing and my hand outs.

On Friday for my work we went to the Boston commons for a field trip. As we sat on the benches eating our snack I watched the playground. In one part of it there was a fountain that sprayed water up from the ground in different intervals. Little kids in swimsuits, diapers or just in there cartoon underwear jumped around in pure joy in the spray. One girl danced in a revel of ecstatic joy, with out shame that people were watching. All she seemed aware of was her perfect moment of joy.
I then looked up at the parents watching them. One woman stuck out to me cause she had a high priced hand bag and a black cocktail dress on as she watched her daughter play. As I looked around I saw how diverse the people were in this small place. People of different levels of class, race, and even sexual orientation all watching contentedly as the children played with hearts filled with joy.
My heart swelled with pride and exaltation as I witnessed the unity of humanity being played out on a playground. It gave me hope that someday all people can coexist in peace.

Last night as I was sitting in bed waiting for sleep to come I thought about this post. I was thinking about power. I have had a strange relationship to power through out my time as a witch. I recognise that some people come to the craft for power over there lives. They come to learn how to cast spells and have miraculus things happen in there lives. Some people fufull their ego needs through doing power plays with there abilities to manipulate others and craft amazing magick. That is alright I guess in the begining but as you get further along I hope that they begin to see where the true power lies.
One of my favorite story books to read to kids when I was working in a preschool was " strega nona: her story" where at the end strega nona's friend shows off her power by putting a goat on the roof and can't get the goat down. Strega nona uses olive oil to make the roof slippery and gets the goat down without magic. Her grandmother teaches her that the strongest magic is an act done with love.
Which also reminds me of Terry Pratchet's lords and ladies. Where granny weatherwax is in a duel with a girl who wants to prove that she is the better witch. Durring the duel a child gets hurt and granny stops the staring at the sun and grabs the child seeing if they are okay. Then goes back to the duel. The towns people judge the contest over because granny proved she was a better witch because a witch could not ignore a childs need.
T thorne coyle Posted that this month was pagan value blog month. So I am posting this one. That compasion for others is of greater value and measure of a witch then power.

At a recent meeting of our mens group, I think it was last month. We did a meditation during the ritual. During the meditation as usual Hecate showed up. We have lots of conversations she and I . This time she was wearing her more pleasant grandma like aspect. We sat in some fancy metal lawn furniture near the crossroads. In back of her I could see the Hecaton with its three masks and three keys and offerings of candles, wine and honey. We were sitting having a chat at the crossroads. She offered me some tea. I looked at the red contents of my china cup and looked up at Hecate. I did the most sensible thing I could think to do.
"Is this poisoned?"
Hecate laughed" No, it's red raspberry zinger!"
The contents of the rest of our chat was friendly but personal so I won't share it hear. When the circle is done we have a sharing time to talk about what happened on our journeys. Everyone laughed when I told them what I had asked Hecate and her response. I recently retold this story to Ellen Dugan when she visited. She didn't laugh and said something like "Sounds like a practical question to ask hecate if she offers you something."

Last night I was reading "The sand man: The kindly ones" Written by neil Gaiman. I was getting sleepy and I started to flip through the pages ahead just to see the pictures and to see what happens. My fingers stopped the page at the scene where Larrissa (thesely) offers tea to Hippolita. The part that caught my eye was that she said "here its red zinger". The kindly ones is all about the three faces of the weaver goddess. I see her as hecate.
I turned to steve and said "wow that is spooky!" Then cause Steve is not in my head explained what I meant.
We got ready for bed and the lights were all out and we fell asleep. I woke to a feeling of something powerful moving by and I heard dogs barking in the neighborhood. I snuggled down in bed and promised myself I would get Hecate some red rasbery zingger in the morning.

I woke yesterday with the feeling of magick coursing through me. Going through my day I was looking through a book of runic lore and my eyes fell on Berkana or the one that looks like a B. Looking on it I felt the intuition from the universe that Jenna would be having her baby soon. Jenna and I are connected through the links that happen when people work magick together for years. She and I worked together a lot through our teen years and on into my college years. It makes me laugh how magickal our relationship stays even though we are many miles apart. I can still turn to Jenna to intuitively understand my dreams and trust her to be open to all the odd things that happen when one is a witch.
I dreamed about this baby years before he was even conceived. I could tell by how old her first daughter was about when it would happen. That he was a boy. When Jenna got pregnant and told me it was a boy I laughed out "I told you so" and she replied "I guess you did". Recently I was visiting Suz and her son Dorian for his birthday. I was telling her about Jenna being pregnant and it being a boy. She asked me"Now is that doctor knowing or Adam knowing?" I said both and laughed. Suz said she had come to know that I was "always right". I laughed because I know I am not always right. It would be hubris to think so. I am not a god, just a psychic.
I wrote Jenna about the feeling I had. She wrote back that she was feeling the first signs of labor. I thank the gods for all my blessings. Friendships, like Jenna and Suz, that have lasted through the test of time and enough sight to appear "always right".

This morning I took it into my head to walk to the gym again. Since the gym is right next to the park I thought I would go there and meditate before going home. I had some inspiration about how we should make choices out of love for ourselves. One of the choices I made years ago was that I was going to go to the gym, eat healthy and meditate regularly. I made all these choices out of love for me and everyday I choose them again. I made up some declarations in meditation.
it goes something like this:

I am surrounded in the love of the Goddess and God
I love all parts of myself as I am.
Out of love, I choose to improve myself.
out of love, I drink more water.
Out of love, I eat small portions of food.
Out of love, I get enough rest.
Out of love, I meditate regularly.
Out of love, I challenge myself to be the best in each moment.
out of love, I forgive myself and all others.
From love of self blossoms love for all others.
In gratitude I bless all others.

What do you do out of love for yourself? Lauri Cabot once said that all acts of magic are acts of love.

To celebrate Beltane I say we all make limericks. We can all be bards for today and use this potent yet mostly unused art form to bless or make satire. To remind you of high school English A limerick is a five lined poem that has the rhyme scheme of A A B B A. For example mine is about disc world.


There once was a king from Lancre,
who was always kind of a wanker
His beautiful queen
could never be mean
Or else his highness would spank her.


A Blessed Beltane to every one!

It just seems logical since I read so much that I at least post about the books I enjoyed. The purpose of these posts will be to show the books that I enjoyed, that I think have merit, and will be mostly positive. I see no purpose in tearing apart an authors work or giving criticism , that is what an editor is for. I know the work that goes into a book all to well with both my partners being writers.
( The review of  )

I am doing Tarot readings at Winnekenni Castle in Haverhill Mass. April 30th from 6 to 9:30. It is a beautiful place to get a reading.Every third reading goes to the up keep of the castle and its grounds. For more information on the castle and its history look to
http://www.winnekenni.com/
And for more info on me, Adam Sartwell, my readings and healing work Please check out my website at
http://web.me.com/owlstar
I am really excited about this event. I know most of my live journal friends would not  be able to make it but I wanted to share it anyway.
Bright blessings.

as I wait for my iphone to charge up I thought I would post something. Yesterday The boys were off doing what they do best and since I was left to my own devices I made a solar fluid condenser and sun incense. The whole day I smelled of oranges and frankincense. I started watching the "tomorrow people" which is one of the sets of dvds we have around the house. Steve grew up with this show. It is awesome if you like campy scifi. Which I do.
The boys forgot their DVD of wyrd sisters for coven movie night and I came to the rescue. I got to sit in on movie night which was cool. We didn't get through the whole movie but that is okay I have seen it a couple of times.
So in closing I quote:
Nanny "what are those things on the wall?"
Granny "sigils or somesuch"
Nanny "fancy"
Granny"Modern! when I was a girl we only had a couple of pins and a ball of wax, we had to make our own enchantment in those days."
Nanny "well we have all passed a lot of water since then."

I love Nanny Ogg.

I made chili in the crock pot and it smells so good. I have checked off a good 70% of my to do list for today. I still have some ways to go on things but the most important ones on the list are done. Well I am off to make corn bread and clear the kitchen table off(aka my desk).

I enjoyed date night with my men. We went to indian food. I had good chicken curry and garlic nan which always puts me in a good mood. Then we went to see monsters verses aliens which I must admit was funnier then what I would have thought it would be. I laughed and ate junior mints, which is my favorite movie candy.

So I don't know which god is giving me the burst of energy at six in the morning but ummm thanks!Must be some April fools joke from them to give me the one who doesn't have that much work today all the getup energy. The boys are still asleep but I am so wired! I don't know what is wrong with me. Not sure if I am getting a message from my dad today cause I woke up with that annoying "Cats in the cradle and silver spoon song". For those of you that don't know, the song I wake up with usually is a sign. I am now cleansing it out of my head with Kryptonite by three doors down.
I had this intense cleaning dream. I had these great purple gloves and comet that I was using to clean my friend suz's bathroom. Last time I dreamed about her I traveled all the way up to Bloomfield Vermont to see her and her cutie patutie son. I think I will call her and my parents today.
Must be the conversation that I had with the boys last night that It had been a while since I was in Vermont and Steve is going there without me. Some days it is weird not to live in my homeland of Vermont. With its rolling mountains and lay lines filled with pure natural energy. Yeah so I am a little home sick, it is bound to happen to a guy some time.

I just saw a post about something yezida Was thankful for and I Thought I would put one up. I am thankful for the awesome feeling of going to the gym, coming home, and still having energy to get through the work I have to do today. I love the feeling of being on the treadmill and sweating out all the built up toxins in my body. Feeling my inner fire rise. Pushing through the wall of my asthma and allergies to the point where I can breath without tightness or strain. Feeling my blood pump and my body enjoy its energies circulate. The feeling of flight as I bound like a deer.
That is what I am thankful for today.
What are you Thankful for?

I have been working on getting my name out as a Psychic. I want to do more readings and healing work so I have put up a website in hopes of getting the whole thing going. Here it is for those who are interested:

http://web.me.com/owlstar

I was going to post about how watchmen made me depressed but I am not sure I want to spread that kind of energy out into the universe. It is not that it wasn't a great film with it's super effects and full frontal effects, it is the movies content. I think the fact that I read it when I was a hormone driven teen that I didn't remember how unsettling it is. I remember seeing a full frontal comic and getting a little hot for super human blue guys with god like powers. More evidence that the id side of self remembers only what it wants to.
Instead I post this controversial and mind numbing statement:

I Liked "confessions of a shopaholic" better!

There I said it! Give me a good laugh at physical comedy and heart melting romance over another bitter piece about how tragedy brings us together in peace.

I hate job hunting. Partially cause today I just want to start my knitting project and ignore the whole thing.

Curse you Snowplow! I had at least another hour of sleep in me! Now not only am I awake because of your horn, I am super soberly awake because of the cold! Curse you cold! how dare you cause Steve's door handle to break!Curses snow again!

So I went to the atm today to find that my card had been deactivated. I called the customer service and found that someone had been having a grand old time at a cvs and riteaid in NY with my debit card #. It is days like this that makes me thing that cursing isn't really all that bad of an idea is it? I know I should atleast be glad that my bank stopped it before I lost all my money. The sucky thing is I was going to do stuff today. Now I have to wait until tomorrow and fill out claim forms at the bank.
Along with this feeling of wanting to boil someone in oil I have the condo plow guys not plowing my spot. They have I assume left for the day. Though someone is getting towed for parking in a visitor spot. Can't get the parking lot done but can tow people at there own expence. If I new a good way to protest I would but they are "in the rights".

So Happy Martin luther king day every one!